"i don't know if I'm going to make it through the obstycles I've created for my life."
Wow, that's hard.

Earth Day is like Valentine's Day for me!! I love you boo!!

Thank you for this planet.
I am obsessed with it and I vow to cherish this land in every way I can.
Amen. Namaste.

I get so caught up in the greens and pinks and yellows of this world. The tall native trees and their beautiful shady leaves that spring and fall and bloom in between. I am fascinated with flowers that make me smile; the florescent ones, the multicolored ones and especially the ones the catch your nose so swiftly like it's a magnet for your senses.

I love to be struck by natural color. To be drawn in to a blossoming seed is sorta like falling in love-thinks the hippie in me. Because I find pleasure in the land of divine from textures and colors and the thoughts they bring to mind.

Sunflowers revert me to my mom and summertime and the enormous one that grew back in 1999. I was astonished at its size and edible seeds, I wish I had a picture to one day show my seeds.

Palm trees bring me joy because California is my life. Don't know how they all got here, probably through some strife. But I smile and I admire all the streets and beaches aligned with the big bulky plants that remind me of good times.

Whether I'm taking pleasure in my favorite medic or snapping a photo for future joy, I love you planet, I love you Earth, you're always on my mind.

Infatuated

It's a funny thing when you suddenly realize something about yourself that you dislike.

I have come to notice that I often base decisions off of pure infatuation.

Sometimes it very superficial; like when I go shopping I'll buy a dress that fits my body very well, but I don't even like the pattern. In turn, I never wear the thing and end up giving it away to a friend with bad taste (haha, just for comedic purposes I wrote that).

Other times I'll find one small detail about I man that I like and become so involved in him, even though I know we'll never work out. I once had a four month tryst (that led to lots of drama) with a co-worker because I thought his butt looked so nice in his work pants. He was a weirdo, talked so soft that you could never hear what he said and we had only one comment interest (pff pff give) but my obsession over his body in that uniform made me decide that I "liked" the guy.

So, after realizing that I am starting a bad habit of "infatuatious decision-making" (my word, i made it up thank you) all over again, I declare to end it now. Or at least I'm taking the necessary steps...

I will no longer put myself in debt because of infatuation, pretend to be someone I'm not because of infatuation or get involved with a man because I'm infatuated with a part of his body.

Unless that part...well I'll just say I may get involved but innocently enough to withhold the infatuation. ;)

Thanks for listening. Peace